I went away this weekend. I attempted to write something but ended up drinking three mini boxes of wine with a straw. Unfortunately for me, writing and wine don’t quite mix (but remember what does pair well with wine?) So my irregular blog schedule continues. I promise it’s something I’m working on fixing!
So naturally when I returned from my weekend away, I met up with Coach. As you all know, Coach and I recently kind of had the dreaded DTR convo… kind of (for those of you who aren’t familiar with Coach, I suggest you go back and read my last bunch of Boys posts). Butttttt the thing is, we DTR-ed by not really defining the relationship and not deciding to be exclusive and basically not taking any action at all. Make sense? No? Let’s just go with it. I’ve seen him four times since the DTR convo, and things are very normal and progressing as I assume a mature adult relationship progresses. Did I ever mention I’ve never been in a relationship? No? Well… yep. But it’s not surprising considering my typical indifference toward people.
Anyway, we went to the Liquid Courage Comedy Club at Slumbrew in Somerville. It was pretty fun and the food and beer were great! During one of the sets, a comedian asked “anyone here single?” and asked for a show of hands. Andddddd neither Coach nor I raised our hands.
I didn’t act weird at all in the moment. Shocking, I know. But now… I can’t help but wonder. I mean, I’m not dating anyone else and I’m not sleeping with anyone else. And as I understand, neither is he. So did we not raise our hands because even though we aren’t together together, technically we are together? Or would it just have been weird to raise our hands since we were out together? Either way, I don’t consider myself single at the moment. But I feel like this situation is a pretty common one. This is what my friend Danny* has named a “Situationship”. We’ve all been there.
So sans DTRing, how and when do you decide you are suddenly not single?
- Do you see the person you’ve been seeing on a regular basis?
- Would you flirt with someone else in front of the person you’ve been seeing?
- Are you interested in dating anyone else?
- Are you interested in sleeping with anyone else?
- Have you told your friends about the person you’ve been seeing?
- Have you told your mom (or parent figure) about the person you’ve been seeing?
- Have you and the person you’ve been seeing talked about going away together for a weekend trip?
- Is this weekend trip potentially a long ways away but still very likely to happen?
- Do you have a couples massage scheduled with the person you’ve been seeing?
- If a comic asked you to raise your hand if you’re single, would you raise your hand?
If the answer to 1, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9 is yes, and the answer to 2, 3, 4, and 10 is no… then you might not be single.
But, I’m in no place to tell you what that means… I’ll let you know when I find out.